Monday, October 5, 2020

Comment Wall

 

(Image Information: Personal Photo of my cat, Ziggy (September 2019)

https://sites.google.com/view/
taeamsportfolio

8 comments:

  1. Hi,
    I really enjoyed your frog and tick story. When I was reading this I remembered the story this was coming off of. I think you did a good job showing how every different aspect of life has to find a way to survive on their own time and sometimes this will come at the detriment of others.

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  2. Hello Taeam!
    I haven't read 'The Crocodile and the Monkey', but I do enjoy stories that give witty lessons and have characters outsmarting each other. I'll definitely have to check that story out! Have you read 'The Cunning Crane and the Crab'? It's short story that I feel is similar to the one you have read, and think you may like it as well! I liked that your story was a fast read, and got the point across quickly. I would suggest you to develop the plot of the story more if you wanted to lengthen it. I think that your writing is very interesting, and I especially liked the author's note. It's surprising that you decided to use a tick as the protagonist of your story considering the past experience you've had with them! I think the last line two sentences of your note was very clever, and it set up the little lesson in your story well. I'm excited to read more of your writing in the future!

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  3. Hi Taeam, I loved your first story about the tick and the frog! I remember reading a story similar to this before, although the characters were slightly different. I think your story is a little bit different because the tick is not just a harmless prey for the frog, but is in fact a dangerous parasite that can suck the frog's blood. I think it would be interesting if you explored this relationship a bit more, maybe adding a little to the story about the tick taking advantage of the frog falling for his trick by sucking his blood. Just a suggestion if you want to flesh out your story some more! Also, just wanted to point out that when the frog says, "You’re a tick, are you not aware of the fact that I am a frog who particularly enjoys eating frogs?", did you mean to say eating ticks? I found that part a little confusing. Beyond that, I very much enjoyed reading your first story, and I look forward to reading the rest of your project!

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  4. Hey Taeam, great job on the story. I really liked the way you added dialogues into the story. It was a unique take on a traditional story and an easy read too. I'm excited to read more from you !

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  5. Hi Taeam, I chose to read your portfolio from the class list because of the name of your title, which made me realize that I might need to tweak mine in order to catch more people's attention! Although your introduction page was blank on my screen (I'm not sure if this is a technical problem on my end or not), I quickly picked up on your portfolio theme. I enjoyed the personalization you explained in the author's note of your connection to nature growing up, and I think it gave the story more depth. Although I have not read 'The Crocodile and the Monkey', I enjoyed the humor used throughout. In the future, I suggest using more of the imagination that you proclaim to delve deeper into each of the characters' roles, which also might add some length to your stories, but also allow you to build on each of the characters' individual wittiness that you want to make known! Keep up the good work.

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  6. Hey Team,
    You did a really good job on your story. I really like your title, I think it is a great attention grabber. I also really like the format of your story and was a great adaptation of the traditional style. Will your next story be one derived from a witty lesson, or you will try a new style of story? A suggestion I might give you is delving more into the origins of your story. I like how you explained that you are interested in stories with a witty message or moral story but I don't really remember the original story of The Crocodile and the Monkey. Another suggestion is checking your introduction page, for me, it shows up as a blank page, you might check to see if it was a publishing issue. Other than that your project is really great so far, keep up the good work!

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  7. Hi TK,
    First of all, I absolutely love the photos on your page! The first photo, the personal picture of Lake St. Mary, is beautiful, and the image of the snake eating a frog is captivating and also startling whenever we click on your page. It is a wonderful way to set the stage for your story and to draw the reader's interest. Your story is really interesting and I love the underdog approach because a tick is so much smaller and seemingly weaker than a frog, but it ends up being the antagonist! Your author's note gives great detail about the story and the characters, including the reason you wrote it, but I suggest placing it at the end of the page after your story. It gave a more background information to flesh out the story, but I think that it would be really impactful after we read the story to then give meaning and purpose after the fact so we can connect the message to the dialogue. If you still want to give some introduction, you could place an 'intro' part right before the story to say that a little tick can show great intelligence and courage.
    Sincerely,
    Rachel

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  8. TK, I could not see anything in your intro section as it was blank but did get to read your story on the tick and the frog. Wow! This tory was short and wonderful and contains great dialogue between the characters. I really liked how the tick outsmarted the frog and fed him to the snake. This story built on the theme we have so often seen in this course about the underdog rising from the ashes and defeating their enemy. In this story the underdog was the small tick and the enemy was the mean bullfrog. I really look forward to reading more of your stories on this portfolio and wish you the best as you continue this semester.

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